The Surrender Project: Day 0 (Bonus Blog)
I was going to start this project on my first full day in India because my flight didn’t land until after 3:00 and I wanted to get a tiny feel for the country and not rush a few hours into a story. However, something happened today that I think embodies exactly the type of thing I want to be aware of and open to during this project. So much so that I am adding an additional Day 0 blog just to share one short story.
We are going to fast forward the day to boarding the plane in Sri Lanka. I am standing in line to check my ticket when I notice the man in front of me has a really cool turquoise ring on. In my head I am like, “dang that is such a cool ring! I should tell him he has a cool ring” but I have headphones in and overthink it and just decide not to say anything. I don’t think much of it and wait in line as the attendant checks a few more boarding passes and a minute or two goes by. At this point I took out my headphones to be polite and say hello to the attendant, so I overhear her say “ooh Bolivia, do you like Bolivia?” And the man in front of me responds with shockingly clear English, “I may be a bit biased but yeah, I love it” accompanying a chuckle. Now it stood out because I barely detected an accent, and I haven’t spoke with too many Americans over the last few months so again this random dude had caught my attention. Again I had the urge to say something to him but for some reason didn’t. He walks away and I hand the attendant my passport and ticket, she scans it and hands it back with a foreigner sheet that I need to fill out before I land in India, she has been handing these out to everybody without an Indian passport. I take a step and the man from the line is walking back towards the attendant because she forgot to hand him that slip of paper, so I pause for a second, hear him say something about the sheet and probably a “thank you” and turn back around to go towards some seats. At this point we are basically walking next to each other and I cannot help but say something to him now, “hey man, I hope you do not mind me asking, where are you from?” He faces me and smile and tells me he’s from Bolivia. I respond with “that’s really cool, I just had to say something because your English is incredible” and this leads us to start talking about how he went to school in the United States. He is probably around my age, and within the first minute of us talking I for some reason find myself sharing my project Idea for India, the idea that I want to completely surrender to life and see where it takes me. He just laughs and says, “this is further proof to me that everything happens for a reason” and shares his number with me. Again, I got this strangers number within a minute or two of us talking, and it felt completely normal. He then proceeds to invite me to come stay at a holy place he is staying in Northern India, where he will be living for a few months with a Guru/saint/holy figure and 150 or so others as they practice meditation and yoga practices, with an emphasis on giving back and doing acts of service. A place he has already spent time before and with this Guru, one who he is practicing with because he is currently a Shamans apprentice and his teacher sent him here. At this point I have chills rippling across my body as I actually introduce myself to this stranger. We end up talking for a minute or two more about the details and a brief spiritual rundown before we get on the flight. I tell him I hope to see him one day and he just goes, “I have a pretty solid feeling that we will be seeing each other not too far down the line.” I walk back to my seat feeling floored by this interaction. There is so much to unpack here and as I sit down I am trying to comprehend it and make sense of it.
Less than 12 hours prior I was laying in bed feeling a bit anxious not knowing what was going to happen. I was worried nothing magical would take place, I was trying to find a plan to grab onto, something to make me feel a little bit comfortable about it all. And then BAM, life absolutely clocks me across the face and is like, “Henry this is the point of it all. You are not in control of what is going to happen so stop trying to predict it, just release to it and allow the magic to unfold. Sit in the uncomfortableness of not knowing and TRUST that it will flow how it is supposed to.” Life kept pushing me to say something to this guy; noticing the ring and wanting to say something but I didn’t, for some reason the one person the attendant chooses to ask a question to is him, allowing him to speak and for me to hear it, another reason to say hi. And then after me still not doing anything the attendant doesn’t hand him a sheet that she is handing to everybody else? Forcing him to come back just as I’m done. So many little things that life was like, “hey Henry you should talk to this guy” and when I failed to notice life basically forces it to happen. And within a minute or two he is inviting me to go learn and meditate in the presence of a Guru?! Like how insane is this?! Am I the only one that just feels absolutely floored by this?? I could feel my body vibrating, you know that feeling where every cell seems to come alive for a moment? Just shaking my head basically laughing to myself that this happened. I don’t know man, maybe you could argue this is just a coincidence but I do not believe that for a second. I choose to believe in the magic that is happening around us all the time if we just slow down and notice it. I think all of these events unfolded the way they did for a reason. I like to imagine the higher powers at play laughing and being like “oh Henry this is just a tease of what is possible, of what can happen if you allow us to do our thing.”
It was just such a good reminder to me that the entire point of tis project is to test the theory that I am not in control. That it is okay to not know what I want to do with my career when I am done traveling, that it is okay not to have it all planned out, that I never did in the first place. A year ago I was in a moving van driving across the country with all my belongings to go live in Colorado and in the mountains, the “plan” was two years there. At that point I would never have predicted I would be four months into traveling, in India by myself in a random city on this quest to challenge everything I know about how this world works. I am half a day into this and it already feels like such a momentous part of my life, a shifting in my core. As I sat in the second to last row on that plane, looking out the window with nobody else in my row, a really powerful feeling of peace washed over me. Which is an incredible feeling and space to be in as I start this next journey, a space that allows me to sit in the awareness of everything unfolding around me, allowing me to simply be a complete witness to where my life is going to take me; today, tomorrow, and in the weeks, months, and years to come.
